Chapter 29

Chapter 29

Doyeon slumped over on his desk, alone, in a very noisy classroom. He tried to control his feelings the whole time.

I need to. I need to.

Doyeon closed his eyes.

* * *

The moment he decided to dismiss his feelings, the second semester midterms began.

Hyunoh was on edge all the time, like he always was during exam season, which meant Doyeon could put some distance between himself and Hyunoh. He also had to focus on exams, which meant less thinking about Hyunoh.

When exam season ended, Doyeon put distancing into practice until they grew more and more awkward and, in the end, they didn’t call or text each other.

One day after school, Doyeon walked down the slope, breathing into the cold air that spread his breath like mist. It was obvious winter was right around the corner because the wind began to bite.

Kangbin slung his arm around Doyeon’s shoulders.

“Do you want to go to a ski resort with me over break? You can sleep in our vacation house.”

“Hmm. I don’t like repeating myself, Kangbin, but this hyung of yours is broke... I can’t afford good winter clothes for snowboarding.”

“You just need to bring your body. You will sleep in my vacation house, wear my clothes, and borrow my sister’s board. You’re a similar height. I’m sure you’ll fit!”

But Doyeon shook his head. “Thanks, but I’ll have to think about it. I don’t think I can stay overnight for that long either.”

“Okay, but don’t think too long. Just accept. Sunwoo said he’s coming, and what about you, Hyunoh? You’re coming too, right?” Kangbin turned the question around.

Instead of saying yes like they all expected, Hyunoh refused.

“I can’t.”

“Why?!”

“I’m going to Hawaii in a few days.”

“Why?!”

“My grandma lives there.”

“Oh, really? Yeah, you should visit your grandma. We can move the trip so you can come after visiting her.”

“No thanks. I only see her once a year, so whenever I’m there, I try to stay for a month.”

“A month?” Kangbin drooped, disappointed that he’d only gotten confirmation out of Sunwoo.

* * *

Several days after winter break began, Doyeon had to pack his bags.

He had agreed to go to the ski resort after Kangbin’s several pleas.

“Dude, I’m telling you that I’ll give you a place to sleep, a board, my snowboarding suit, and my goggles. I’ll even get you the resort ticket, so come on! If you feel grateful, you can buy us drinks at the convenience store!

Kangbin had said those words over and over again like a broken record since the first day of break, refusing to accept a trip solely with Sunwoo.

In the end, Doyeon agreed.

He was still packing his bag when his mother arrived after her shift, tired and worn.

“You said you’re leaving today, right?”

“Yeah. I’ll be leaving in an hour.”

“How many days is it again?”

“Two.”

“Okay, be careful. Who’s going?”

“Kangbin and Sunwoo. It’s us three, but Kangbin’s sister will be driving us. His sister’s going to hang out with her friends at the ski resort, too. We’re like, freeloading off of them, basically.”

His mother’s expression turned dark when she heard Kangbin’s name.

Doyeon’s mother was particularly wary of him because Kangbin looked like someone who’d fool around and get in trouble. She also knew about the many problems he kicked up. When Doyeon and Kangbin first became friends, she had thought a rich kid was trying to take advantage of him. While that misunderstanding was cleared a long time ago, she still didn’t feel entirely comfortable.

“What about Hyunoh?”

“Hyunoh?”

“Isn’t Hyunoh going with you?”

“Oh, not this time. He said he needed to visit his grandma.”

“I’d feel better about this if Hyunoh was going with you...” His mother clicked her tongue and turned around.

She agreed to let him go since Doyeon had never gone to a ski resort before, and the trip was free, but she looked worried.

Doyeon stared at his mom downing barley tea and scratched his neck.

Hyunoh reassures her? How had Hyunoh managed to give her such a good impression of himself when they’d barely met?

Doyeon was amazed by Hyunoh’s social skills once again.

* * *

A few hours later, Doyeon found out Kangbin’s vacation home was a huge mansion near the ski resort.

The moment they unpacked their belongings, they changed into their ski suits and rode in his sister’s car into the resort.

“Wow...” Doyeon gaped.

He’d never seen a ski resort before. He’d seen them several times on TV, but in real life, the place looked majestic, with sharp and high slopes.

The three rolled around the ski resort for hours until it reached closing time.

“Oh, my bones,” Doyeon groaned under a hot shower. He felt alive under the warmth of it after rolling in cold snow and facing the cold winds.

He walked up to the second floor after bathing and squished himself onto a couch. Sunwoo was spraying something all over himself on the opposite seat.

“What are you doing? Is that pain relief spray?”

“Yes. My whole body is hurting. I slammed my face into the snow when I last fell, and my life flashed before my eyes.”

“I told you to hang out in the beginner area with me.”

“Kangbin kept telling me I was good! Then he just shot off by himself and...” Sunwoo complained as he sprayed Doyeon’s offered shoulder. The short version was that he could ski because he learned how when he was little, but he couldn’t snowboard, which he only realized after getting overconfident.

“Snack time!” Kangbin waved a few bottles of beer and a box of donuts. He was the last to arrive because he was the last to shower.

Doyeon stared at the sloshing bottles of beer in surprise. “Where did you get that? Did you steal it?”

“Yes. From my house.”

He actually stole it.

Kangbin lowered all the curtains in the room, saying his sister would kill him if she ever found out. With a grin of victory, he slammed down both bottles on the table.

“None of you are sleeping until we finish these bottles!”

“I agree! You’re all going to die today!”

Doyeon stared at the two, then sniffed the caps Kangbin popped off the bottles. He didn’t like it.

“What’s with the smell?”

Thinking his nose might have malfunctioned, he took another sniff and decided yes, it was disgusting.

“Hey, do I need to? You two can go ahead. I’ll keep watch to see if Jinju comes around.”

“Wow, what’s with the betrayal? Do you know how scared I was sneaking these out? We need to get sloshed together!”

“I think it’ll be too bitter for me.”

“Life and booze is bitter. That’s why they should be swallowed.”

“Who the hell made you a philosopher?”

“My mom.”

“Oh. Your mom has an amazing outlook on life.”

They tried to begin their beer party, but they were stopped.

Kangbin’s older sister Jinju had walked in to patrol them. No one could escape her sharp radar despite the curtains.

“I knew Kangbin Baek would do this. Kids, you can enjoy this in college, yeah? Down your Cokes.”

She brought three boxes of soda instead. Thanks to her, the three stayed up all night finishing those Coke bottles instead of beer.

“Hey! Whoever goes to sleep tonight is dead, get it? We’re going to stay up all night!” Sunwoo was determined to do crazy things until dawn.

The three talked and played until the morning sun peeked out, and when it finally grew into colors of orange, they began dozing like sick chickens.

That didn’t mean they didn’t have another round of skiing. They did. Except, this time, they didn’t ski into the night, but returned earlier out of sheer exhaustion. The wind was cold, their bodies were about to break down, and with every fall and roll came groans of pain.

When Doyeon finished washing and sat on the couch, he blanked out. The other two were already sitting there, also spacing out.

“Dude, I’m going to freaking die.”

“Same.”

“But I also feel like I shouldn’t sleep right now. It’s like, early, even though it’s the evening.”

“Right.”

The three ate at the resort and blinked slowly through more bottles of soda.

Doyeon couldn’t shake off the feeling that something was missing.