Chapter 226

Chapter 226

Revealing the group chat screenshots wasn’t a controversial move.

- Are they really prepping a comeback? And Raebin is doing the title track?

- What’s with that group chat announcement LOL (Screen capture of the line “Don’t use more than ten emojis at a time. Yes, we’re talking about you, Lee Sejin”)

- Look at Moon Puppy. He always focuses on getting the work done no matter what chaos is going down in the chat. Maybe being a puppy, chaos is just his element

- Bae Sejin really uses hamster emojis? Wild T_T

If there was nothing included that had the potential to become an issue, non-serious, approachable content like this was always popular. Since there was also a hint regarding their next comeback, the fans were always going to have fun with it. I did get some unexpected advice, however, before uploading.

“Uh, Moondae, you’re going to upload the screenshots yourself?” Big Sejin had asked.

“Yeah.”

“Isn’t it better that Chungwoo does it? Since he’s the leader.”

“…!”

“He usually doesn’t upload stuff like this, so I bet the fans will be really excited to hear from him. Don’t you think?”

He was right. And it would be more natural coming from Chungwoo than me since I’d established a pattern several times already. I accepted Big Sejin’s suggestion and had our leader upload the post instead.

- No way, Chungwoo uploaded this!

- Ryu Chungwoo saved all the members’ numbers with animal emojis. That is cuteness the world doesn’t deserve T_T

In the end, everything turned out well, which meant I should have been happy, no questions asked. But I had questions floating around in my mind, however.

Why didn’t I think of that before Big Sejin did? I’d gotten ahead of myself, like an over-eager kid. Maybe some self-reflection was in order. Was I losing my touch? I tutted, crossing my arms.

No mistakes next time. Of course, we had to complete preparations for our comeback first. We’d ensured that things would work out even if Raebin joined us later, but it was still essential for us to rehearse everything on an actual stage altogether. The other members, including myself, would get a bit of time to relax since we’d already finished a lot of the filming that had been possible to do without Raebin. This was not the case for him.

He needs to do everything starting now. As a result, Raebin had been smacked in the face with a veritable wall of work as soon as he joined us, and it occupied the vast majority of his time. Still, he didn’t forget to thank us, even so.

A few days after his return, he came to my room at night as soon as he had a free moment.

“My sister asked me to give this to you and Eugene! It’s also an expression of my thanks. Thank you very much.”

He was holding out a gift set of honey cookies and pumpkin sikhye. It had probably come by post, but the package was huge.

He seems to know Eugene’s tastes well, at least… It was simpler to just give us the same gift, and the reasonable thing to do was match the tastes of one of us—the one he knew best. I didn’t really have strong preferences when it came to food.

Though it makes me wonder when I’m going to eat all this. Regardless, I owed him my gratitude. I took the box, which was wrapped in a huge cloth.

“Thank you. This all looks really delicious.”

“Thank you! I’ll tell my sister you liked them,” Raebin said, nodding and grinning. The pleasant expression didn’t make him look any less fierce, considering he hadn’t been able to sleep properly for several days now.

I debated for a moment, then caved in to my desire to ask. “And your grandmother?”

“She’s all right! I’ve been in constant contact with my family, and they tell me she’s recovering without any problems.”

This was good news. I nodded without saying anything.

“And I told her that if she experiences any physical discomfort or problems from now on, she should tell me…”

“Good job.” I pat him on the shoulder a few times. Now that we’d been through all of this once, Raebin would be better equipped to handle it, even if the worst should come to pass.

We might not be able to avoid it, but we’ll be able to deal with it. That was good enough for now. Pushing that thought aside, which wasn’t particularly useful to me at the moment, I picked up the package he’d given me.

“I should… store this in the fridge, right?”

“Yes. Oh! Let me take it there for you!”

“It’s fine. You just gave it to me.”

As I took the box to the fridge he asked, “Oh! By the way, I had a question!”

“What?”

He’d followed me, holding his hand up like he was a student in a classroom.

“I was curious why you shared screenshots from our group chat regarding my remote work on the upcoming album!”

“…!”

“There has been no official press released regarding the album yet, and based on my limited knowledge, I was worried that this might risk a leak…” His eyes glowed. “I wanted to ask what you were hoping to achieve that trumped the risk!”

I… never considered it a risk. I looked at him, slightly taken aback.

There’s no risk of the music being leaked unless the messaging app’s servers are hacked, is there? He was so serious about his music and our upcoming album that he was worrying about abstract, theoretical dangers. Even so, I supposed that he was bothered that we’d hinted at a comeback before making an official announcement. I had no intention of telling him about the rude comments that had fueled the decision, of course.

Maybe I’ll have to tell him about the most harmless things that were being said.

I spoke calmly. “Some of your fans realized that you’d gone home to be with your family. We wanted to set their minds at ease.”

This was also part of the reason. Quite a few people had been worried about Raebin’s mental state, though our primary goal was shutting the trolls up.

- LOL Raebin is more serious about his career than you guys ever will be

- Where did all those commenters go?

- Raebin reacted perfectly before you guys could even raise a fuss. Too bad for you lifetime trolls, huh?

Seeing reactions like this had made me feel much better. This reaction is exactly what I wanted.

“Is that right?” Raebin said. He still looked puzzled, however. “But the fans would have been reassured eventually anyway once the official comeback announcement is made next week. The screenshots would have made the fans just as happy if we’d released them after as well. I think it would have been safer to wait— Oh, but I’m sorry. I don’t mean to criticize you.”

I was dazed. Was he right? He was right. He wasn’t right concerning the risk of a leak, but it was true that we hadn’t needed to pay any attention to what the trolls were saying and react to them directly. All issues would have been resolved once the comeback teaser was released.

Rushing to upload the screen captures hinted that we’d been aware of the nonsense and were bothered by it. The only reason it had blown over without issue was because Chungwoo had uploaded them, not me. My initial call had been… wrong.

“You’re right,” I muttered.

Eugene and Ahyeon’s voices echoed in my mind.

“Don’t worry so much, Moondae. We can’t change how other people think.”

“It’s not true, and not everyone believes it.”

I’d admitted recently, after getting feedback from the other members, that I was too focused on controlling public opinion, only to go and do it again. And this time, my actions hadn’t even been all that effective. It was obvious to me why I’d acted this way. I hadn’t been able to stand seeing trolls criticize Kim Raebin when his grandmother might have been dying. F*ck.

“Sorry. I overreacted.”

“N-no! I shouldn’t have asked so many unnecessary—”

“No, you’re right,” I continued under my breath. “I guess it just reminded me of the past.”

“Th-the past?”

“Yeah,” I said. The words spilled out of me like a dam had broken. “I was late.”

“What…?”

“When I arrived, everyone else had already been identified. Only my parents were there late into the night…”

Have I lost my mind? I bit my tongue to stop myself from saying anything more.

“M-Moondae?”

“Sorry. I was rambling. In any case, you’re right. I made a mistake. There was nothing smart or effective about the course of action I suggested.”

“S-sorry!” Raebin looked like he was about to burst into tears.

Sh*t. I put down the box and pressed a hand against my forehead.

“What are you apologizing for?” I asked.

“I brought up something I didn’t need to, and it reminded you of a difficult memory—”

“No,” I said, telling him the truth. “The only reason I find it hard to remember is that I didn’t react the way I should have—”

“No!” Raebin said, cutting me off. He balled his fists, his expression tense. “F-from what I recall, you were studying at an academy at the time. That’s why you were late to hear about what happened. Isn’t that right?”

“Yes…”

I told him that?

Raebin nodded eagerly. “But studying… is what a student should be doing!”

What? I stared at him as if he’d slapped me.

“You were just doing the best you could in the situation you were in. It… was an accident.” He swallowed thickly. “Just like I didn’t do anything wrong by suggesting we go on that trip. Isn’t that right? Th-though the situations aren’t completely the same, of course…”

Right. We’re not the same. Even so, it was true that I’d done the best I could back then. The only problem was that it hadn’t felt like I’d done enough all the same. And no matter how I reacted, there was nothing I could do to avoid the pain. That had been difficult to accept.

“Nobody is good at this sort of thing.”

I’d reassured Raebin of this myself. Nobody was good at this sort of thing. I wove my fingers into my own hair and pulled. Despite it coming as a huge shock, the answer was clear. Comparing my situation to Raebin’s, I could finally see it now.

What could a middle schooler have done, anyway? I’d thought that Raebin was too young to experience a death in his family, but was unable to be understanding of myself when I’d suffered that fate when I was far younger. Maybe it was time I reevaluated things.

Yes. I can go easier on myself. Given that I’d been in middle school, I’d probably done the best I could. I felt lighter all of a sudden. I suddenly felt as though I’d sleep easier when I lay my head down later.

“I-I do think there are a lot of similarities between our situations…” Raebin said.

“Yeah.” I needed to give him a decisive response.

The poor kid was still trying to convince me, shooting me cautious looks. He visibly brightened. “Right? That’s why I said it’s my fault for reminding you of such a difficult time in your life.”

“No, I don’t think that.”

Raebin was claiming he was in the wrong far too cheerfully. That he’d convinced me seemed to have confused his perspective. I picked up the box of honey cookies and drinks and said as gently as I could, “Thanks for putting it so nicely.”

He gasped, bowing politely again. “I’m the one who’s grateful, Moondae. You’ve helped me so much... and I was able to take part in the album creation process without any problems thanks to you.”

He thanked me for that again, even though I’d already explained to him that his participation benefited the whole group. I felt like there would be no end to the conversation at this rate.

Time to clear the air.

I asked him casually, “So you gave Eugene a gift for similar reasons?”

Raebin balked. “No. He was a plus-one, honestly.”

I wasn’t sure if they were good enough friends that they didn’t need friendly gestures between them. Maybe they just considered each other idiots. But I certainly hoped the fans assumed the former to be the case. I shrugged and put the cookies and sikhye in the fridge.

“Thanks,” I said.

“Right!”

The members would end up eating the cookies in the lead-up to our comeback. All the sugar made them gain weight, however, leading to some fierce last-minute dieting.

Actions have consequences. The truly baffling thing was that Eugene didn’t gain any weight. In any case, this amusing little incident passed quickly, and our album release date was fast approaching.

The first sign that it was nearing was the release of the teaser.

** *

“What are you doing?”

“Nothing. Get lost,” Kim Raebin’s fan said, gritting her teeth and pushing her curious little brother away.

Just look them up yourself if you’re so interested! Too macho to admit you like them? He could have looked up Park Moondae himself if he was interested, but he was pretending to pick a fight with her so he could look over her shoulder. Even considering this, however, she was lashing out more than usual. She was worried.

Is Raebin really okay? It had come out that one of his grandparents had fallen ill, affecting how much Raebin could participate in the album. Kim Raebin’s fan bit her nails.

Judging from their social media posts, the family issue probably hasn’t gotten that serious. She had a feeling, however, that given how little time he had to prepare, he would have a smaller part in the upcoming album.

Whatever! Shut the hell up, self! If that turns out to be the case, we’ll just make a lot of noise about him being more involved in the next album! There’s no need to worry about that now! After internally screaming at herself, she adjusted her grip on her mouse. The teaser was going to go live at midnight.

It’s up!

[TeSTAR | “Nightmare” Official MV Teaser]

She clamped a hand over her mouth.

“Oh my god!”

Kim Raebin was in the thumbnail!